HELP with graphics

Hello,
Hi,
I have put a P5Q SE/R & P5Q SE motherboard in and added a VGA Driver V682.
I was having trouble with getting the 2nd external display working. First trouble was I couldn't change the resolution down as the main monitor took on the resolution of the smaller one. try and try.. going through all the trouble shooters and it still would not lower the resolution...
Then all the graphics went like... really big pixels and hardly any colour. You could hardly read anything and the pages were so big you couldn't even get down to the bottom of the page if you need to press exit button.
Although the Windows XP trade mark on start up was fine as well as the basics such as control panel pages. But Big.
So thinking that I had stuffed up something I put another monitor on and the same thing.
Now this is where it gets weird.
I put a 3rd monitor on and it did the same. Big pixels . so I went to another computer put the 3rd monitor back on the second tower where it came from AND IT WAS THE SAME WITH A DIFFERENT TOWER .
So I figured it must have been something like a surge in power for the other tower to do the same thing
So I uninstalled all the graphics that came with the card and the monitor worked fine with the original tower. Wasn't perfect but still OK. I figured it must have been running on a default in the os.
This is where I think I stuffed up... Trying to change the resolution back down I think I turned off the driver for it. Now the computers going, and the monitor is working fine as I have it set up as a second screen on the laptop But when I put it on the first tower no picture comes through. Just a black screen. No windows start up or anything.
SO
How the hell do I get anything to work on a screen that I cant see.
I have put in a boot disc. But at this stage cant find the original xp disc. I've tried the graphics disc....everything seems to be working but i cant see a thing.

Oh... and another thing... the graphics card comes with its own browser 'Splash' ..now that goes... kind of ..as it says that its an old program and doesn't run with XP.. Figure that when the graphics card is new...anyway, the browser I got going through the bios and it can grab some types of files from my hard drive and put them in a file.. but you can tell that its not working properly as the graphics are all over the place shaking like their got Alzheimer's on rattlers..
Got any ideas... PLEASE...
Hope you can follow all of that... it sure confused me when it was all happening...
Cheers